Right now in the Hendry household it is busy, noisy, at times chaotic. We are now a family of 5 and Daniel and I are constantly on the go.
Daniel works full time, and when he finishes work he gets straight into helping me with the boys bedtime. I am with the boys all day, everyday.
As stay at home Mums will know all too well….. it is a never ending job. We never really stop or switch off from Mum duty.
Our day start at 5am, end around 11pm. Right now we never really have time together just the two of us. Now we have three kids, it’s just not as easy to arrange babysitting for a date night.
I know that this is just a phase, it feels a bit like a whirlwind and before we know it, the years will have passed, the boys will be teenagers and the hectic newborn and toddler life will be a distant memory (one we will miss) and we will not know what to do with ourselves.
I think that one of the toughest things to get used to as a parent, is losing the ability to be spontaneous. Before kids if you fancied going for dinner together on a random Tuesday night, followed by the cinema you could. Whereas when kids come along thats just not possible and as a couple that can be hard to get used to.
Until it all settles down and there is a bit more of a stable routine. Dan and I need to think of other ways to squeeze in some time for each other, as Kathryn and Daniel and not as Mum and Dad.
To reconnect, chat about random things, have a laugh and leave the “have you sterilised the bottles?” talk behind. Even if it just 10 minutes of the whole day that we get together.
That’s what parenting is all about, it’s a juggling act, but it’s important to Daniel and I while we are juggling everything, that we make a point of stopping and making time together.
Here are some of ways Daniel and I have been making time for each other since becoming a family of 5.
Grabbing a drive thru coffee
When we are out and about and the kids have dosed off in the back of the car, we grab a drive thru coffee and some buns, park somewhere, and chat.
Staying up a little later in the evening together
After a really busy day it can be so tempting to crash into bed at 8pm when the kids have finally settled, to try and catch up on all the lost sleep. Although if we did that every night we would never see each other. So once everything is calm and all the house jobs are done for the day, we make a point of sitting down on the sofa, chilling out with a cuppa and some biscuits and chat about our day. Some nights it might only be for 10 minutes, but its our 10 minutes.
Saturday Night is Pizza Night
When the weekend finally arrives, we order a takeaway, grab a bottle of wine (or gin in a tin for Dan), and catch up on all our favourite TV shows. It may be not be the same as getting wined and dined at a fancy restaurant, but I really look forward to our takeaway night all week. We can still wine and dine it’s just in our jammies in the living room!
I wish it was a posh hotel buffet style breakfast we had together every morning, with freshly squeezed orange juice, lattes and croissants. In reality most mornings it’s a luke warm coffee and a cereal bar. However instead rushing off in opposite directions first thing with our coffee in hand to get ready, we have our luke warm coffee together.
We don’t have a lot of time in the mornings and sometimes the coffee is downed like a shot, but it is a really nice way to start the day together.